What a Good Opening and Handshake Have in Common

~ by Michele Cushatt

Being a speaker by profession means I’m always meeting new people. Over years and countless events, I’ve heard one comment again and again upon making a new acquaintance:

“Wow. You have quite a handshake!”

It’s often followed by a smile and some kind of follow-up comment referring to my female status. Apparently some believe it’s unusual to find a woman who knows how to extend a solid handshake. Honestly, I never knew otherwise.

Thanks, Dad.

Yes, when I was still in grade school, my dad taught his oldest child and only girl how to shake a hand the right way. And there IS a right way. Do it right and you leave a memorable impression and quite possibly open the door further to relationship. Do it poorly, and your new acquaintance wants to wipe your memory on a pant leg and escape.

When making a presentation, your opening is like your handshake. Do it well, and your audience becomes intrigued, wants to hear more, and get to know you better. On the other hand, a weak, cold or lifeless opening will have your audience looking for the door.

A good opening (like a killer handshake) must have the following elements:

1. Firm Grip: My Dad’s first handshake lesson involved learning my grip. I may be a girl, but he made sure I knew a girl could be strong and confident. Your opening, like your handshake, needs to communicate a combination of both confidence and approachability. Approachability without confidence lacks authority. Confidence without approachability reeks of arrogance. Find the right combination of the two and you’ll captivate your audience.
2. Eye Contact: After learning my grip, Dad taught me to look the other person in the eye. No looking at the floor, no shifting around the room, no closed and contemplative eyes or demure eyes with fluttering lashes. Instead, he taught me to be comfortable looking someone straight in the eye (which takes some practice, I might add). Doing this accomplishes several objectives. First, it makes the other person feel seen. Second, it establishes connection. And third, it shows your belief and passion for your message and life.
3. Warm Smile: A former army vet with a childhood that could make your hair curl, Dad was the definition of intensity. He could grip a hand better than anyone, and never did he fail to make eye contact. But one thing I noticed whenever he met someone new: He always smiled. A firm grip and intense eye contact can be intimidating, whether it’s a tough army guy or woman offering both. Add a smile, however, and the ice melts. A smile provides humanity, and softens the exchange.

Want to make a good impression with your next presentation? Open with a killer handshake.

By the way, nice to meet you.

–

Pulling from a unique set of life experiences, Michele Cushatt writes articles, stories and devotional meditations for numerous publications including MOPS International, Christianity Today, Upper Room, and multiple compilation books including five titles in the Chicken Soup series. Her speaking experience covers the United States and includes Women of Faith, Compassion International, and the Focus on the Family daily radio program. Michele has been on staff with Ken Davis and Dynamic Communicators International for almost 6 years. Michele, her husband Troy and their three teenage boys live in Colorado. To learn more about Michele or any of the DCW staff, check out our Presenters & Coaches page.